Category Archives: Uncategorized

Growing up, I believed that only a certain type of man was masculine. I’m certain the timing of my youth, in addition to the area in which I lived and the men that surrounded my shaped my view of masculinity. A true man, in my youthful mind, was a guy who was silent and somewhatContinue reading “Expanding My View of Masculinity”

I had a very good friend of mine killed over the weekend. He knew about my past, but if it ever inhibited him from maintaining and deepening our friendship, he never indicated it. We rarely talked about it, but the few times that we did, he was very causal and truthful. For him, he wasContinue reading “Finding Hope as a Survivor”

I’ve loved music since I can remember. I grew up in the 70s and 80s, which of course was the last decades of real music, right? During middle school and high school, I could not go a day without some pop song going through my head. It also shaped my attitude for that time, too.Continue reading “Redemption Through Music”

I have had some recent discussions with fellow survivors centering on our value. Many survivors, and some others who have not experienced sexual abuse, have a difficult time with our self value. I began to look at my value different after having some of these discussions. I had always believed that I had no valueContinue reading “Finding Hope”

Throughout most of my life, I’ve struggled with feeling emotions. I’ve been able to experience a variety of emotions, but my body will recognizing and shut down any physical reaction to emotions. Most of the time, the feel-good emotions can come easy for me. I can feel happy and content, I can laugh and beContinue reading “An Emotional Breakthrough”

During my therapy sessions the last few weeks, I feel as if I have made some tremendous strides in healing the wounds from my parents. That understanding has included being able to realize where my parents were coming from and the baggage, both known and unknown to me, which they carried into parenthood. I’ve learnedContinue reading “Healing Family Wounds”

In my group this week, we discussed the idea of our value. Many survivors struggle a lot with the idea that they have value apart from what their perpetrator views and has imbedded in our brains. Most of us have also understood our value as what we do or don’t do for others. These ideasContinue reading “Having Value as a Survivor”

The start of the new year has always been a time when we make promises and goals for ourselves to improve upon various parts of our lives. In recent years, I’ve heard people talk less about resolutions because they want to focus on actually making measurable goals that they will be able to achieve. EspeciallyContinue reading “Resolutions”

Holidays are a stressful time for everyone, but for a survivor, they can be paralyzing. Since there are several expectations, various obligations, and differences in schedules and routines, many people struggle with just keeping up the the tremendous responsibilities. In the end, getting together with family and friends to celebrate is worth the reward ofContinue reading “Holidays”

My therapist asked me once if I was thankful that I had been molested. He prefaced with the fact he knew that it was an odd question, so I understood that I would have to think on the question for a little bit. Once he asked, I knew exactly what he was going for. HeContinue reading “Thankfulness”