Category Archives: Uncategorized

When I was growing up, I thrived when I had a routine. Most of the time, my routines were self imposed. I would get up at the same time, get ready for the day, go through my school routine, and after coming home complete my work in the same manner. Change was hard, unsettling, andContinue reading “Routines and Changes”

I moved away from my hometown at 18 so that I could attend college in California. I remember having a conversation with my younger brother at the time, telling him how I couldn’t wait to leave because of the small-mindedness of everyone. I realized later that it was my anger at my sexual abuse thatContinue reading “Escaping My Past?”

I have had difficulty with friendships as far back as I can remember. I lived in a very rural area in which only one other boy my age lived close. I believe because of this I didn’t learn how to interact with other kids. Adults were always around, and by watching how they interacted, that’sContinue reading “Friendships”

Growing up I had a tremendous fear of men. For whatever reason, and reasons I’m still not certain, I was terrified of adult men. I struggled in elementary school to make friends with other boys, but once I did, the friendships became easier. Oddly enough, it wasn’t until middle school that I finally could feelContinue reading “Fears”

I’m not sure if other survivors have experienced this, but one of the hardest things for me to do is see myself. I posted a picture today showing the beard that I’ve been growing since we’ve been in quarantine. I had to take several pictures, deleting them over and over again because the just didn’tContinue reading “Looking At Myself”

It was only through being honest was I able to transform myself from a victim to a survivor. For a long time, I couldn’t understand the guilt and shame that I was feeling. I blamed myself for the abuse the occurred to me. I figured since I was the one that wanted his friendship soContinue reading “Victim to Survivor”

One of the best things I ever did for my own healing was to enter into therapy and take medication. Once I was honest with a therapist and discussed my sexual abuse, I truly felt healing taking place. However, healing is not an overnight solution. Just like a journey it takes time and hard work.Continue reading “Therapy and Medication”

The first time I was molested, I was 13. Honestly, I thought I had something to do with it. I was so confused about how the relationship changed with my neighbor that I felt responsible for what happened. My first fear is that if my parents found out they would be mad, disown me, andContinue reading “Beginning My Journey”

I guess it’s not a coincidence that I start my first blog on Easter Sunday. My faith has had a great deal to do with my healing from the trauma of my own sexual abuse. I know that my innocence and my young adulthood was robbed from me, but my manhood and my identity wasContinue reading “Happy Resurrection Day”