Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse
Holiday Check-ins
As the holiday season approaches, I want to encourage you all to check in on your friends and family who you know are survivors. Although we may appear to be alright, the holidays can be a very traumatic and triggering time. From my experience, sexual abuse occurs far more by family members than it occurs…
Sorry for the past few months…
I haven’t posted anything here in a long time, but I realized that I get caught up in life just as everyone else does. Work, family, gym, groups, and friends can make it very easy for me to put off writing during this time. I’d like to think that I’m more dedicated than I am,…
Striking a Balance with Hobbies
As an introvert, many of the hobbies that I involve myself center on things I can do alone. I love reading, and most of the time, I like a quiet still environment to fully get into the story. I can read with others around and sometimes when others are watching TV, but it isn’t the…
Healing Through Spirituality
One of the most difficult and most powerful aspects of our lives is our spirituality. I believe that our spirituality also can heal us tremendously. Unfortunately, many people have used spirituality and the Church to abuse us and take advantage of us sexually. My hope is that all survivors will be able to look past…
Improving Mental Health
One of the most important parts of healing in our journey as survivors is improving and maintaining our mental health. I believe that there are a variety of ways in which we can have a healthy outlook on our lives. First, and most obvious, is to find a therapist. I’ve been participating in therapy since…
Being Physically Healthy
Since last March, I have really made concerted attempts to go to the gym regularly. Except for a week or two of illness and vacation, I have gone between four and six times a week. I’ve really felt good about my goals, my consistency, and my progress. It has been a huge benefit to my…
Feeling Like I Don’t Belong
For much of my life, I felt like I didn’t belong. I didn’t have much contact with my peers growing up except for school. I didn’t go over to friends’ houses except for maybe three times my entire life before I could drive. I lived in isolation and always felt like everyone else had friends,…
Sadness
For many survivors, the holidays hold sadness. I believe that I was very fortunate that my perpetrator was not in my family, so I only saw him on certain occasions. Yet I still experience a great deal of sadness during the holidays because my routine is disrupted and I have more time to think irrationally.…
The Grooming Relationship
The part of my sexual abuse that is the most disturbing for me is the fact that my perpetrator groomed me for his own pleasure. The deception and trust that was broken had lasting effect on how I viewed every relationship thereafter. Perpetrators seems especially keen and adept at finding young men and women who…
Handling Emotions
The first thing my sexual abuse taught me was to bury my emotions. Mostly just the negative ones, like sadness, frustration, and anxiety. I thought that if I could keep in control all of the time over my negativity, then no one would ever know what was going on inside. The side effect of this…
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Harry L. Estes 