Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse
Do I Deserve Happiness?
I think that many of us as that question frequently. For myself, I usually answer that question with a confident “no”. I believe it’s because I can look at all of the poor choices in my life and realize that I don’t deserve to have any happiness. From a purely human standpoint, I believe thatContinue reading “Do I Deserve Happiness?”
Dressing Up the Dead
I was recently listening to some old albums when I came across a song by the band, Flyleaf, called “This Close”. The lyrics that struck me are: I don’t know who I am anymoreNot once in life have I been realBut I never felt this close beforeI’ve been looking in your windowI’ve been dressing inContinue reading “Dressing Up the Dead”
Protection
As I’m starting my four book, the theme of protection comes up several times. Any one who has experienced any type of trauma knows that protection is one of our first priorities. I believe it is something that survivors of sexual abuse rarely let loose. First of all, physical protection is crucial in how aContinue reading “Protection”
Maintaining Connections
Recently, I’ve re-connected with some friends from high school and college. It’s been invigorating for me because I’m very much an introvert. Especially since I’ve been teaching from home, I’ve become deeply involved in my introverted activities. I confessed to one of my friends that I need to reach out to others more because, ifContinue reading “Maintaining Connections”
Expanding My View of Masculinity
Growing up, I believed that only a certain type of man was masculine. I’m certain the timing of my youth, in addition to the area in which I lived and the men that surrounded my shaped my view of masculinity. A true man, in my youthful mind, was a guy who was silent and somewhatContinue reading “Expanding My View of Masculinity”
Finding Hope as a Survivor
I had a very good friend of mine killed over the weekend. He knew about my past, but if it ever inhibited him from maintaining and deepening our friendship, he never indicated it. We rarely talked about it, but the few times that we did, he was very causal and truthful. For him, he wasContinue reading “Finding Hope as a Survivor”
Redemption Through Music
I’ve loved music since I can remember. I grew up in the 70s and 80s, which of course was the last decades of real music, right? During middle school and high school, I could not go a day without some pop song going through my head. It also shaped my attitude for that time, too.Continue reading “Redemption Through Music”
Finding Hope
I have had some recent discussions with fellow survivors centering on our value. Many survivors, and some others who have not experienced sexual abuse, have a difficult time with our self value. I began to look at my value different after having some of these discussions. I had always believed that I had no valueContinue reading “Finding Hope”
An Emotional Breakthrough
Throughout most of my life, I’ve struggled with feeling emotions. I’ve been able to experience a variety of emotions, but my body will recognizing and shut down any physical reaction to emotions. Most of the time, the feel-good emotions can come easy for me. I can feel happy and content, I can laugh and beContinue reading “An Emotional Breakthrough”
Healing Family Wounds
During my therapy sessions the last few weeks, I feel as if I have made some tremendous strides in healing the wounds from my parents. That understanding has included being able to realize where my parents were coming from and the baggage, both known and unknown to me, which they carried into parenthood. I’ve learnedContinue reading “Healing Family Wounds”
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