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Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse

Change is Terrifying

Yesterday, I went to church and for the first time in a long time I was able to remove my mask. I loved the fact that I didn’t have something covering my face and restricting my breathing. I’ll be thrilled when this mask mandate is lifted. Just another significant change towards normal, which felt great.Continue reading “Change is Terrifying”

What Do I Need?

I asked this question of myself the other day: What do I need to continue my journey of recovery? I feel like I’ve come so far since my youth in becoming more emotionally healthy. Currently, I am in therapy once a week, which has been outstanding. I’ve been exercising five to six time a weekContinue reading “What Do I Need?”

When Do I Tell?

In my experience, the disclosure of sexual abuse can sometimes be as traumatizing as the experience itself. When I first told others about my past sexual abuse, I cried more at that time then when I was abused. I felt scared, anxious, and alone when I first revealed my past. I wasn’t certain how peopleContinue reading “When Do I Tell?”

Resistance to Change

If this last year has taught me anything, it has been to be flexible. My personality does not do change well. I prefer a routine, some stable set of activities that I can rely on so that I can function when things get difficult. No one really had that this year. I think that someContinue reading “Resistance to Change”

Dressing Up the Dead

I was recently listening to some old albums when I came across a song by the band, Flyleaf, called “This Close”. The lyrics that struck me are: I don’t know who I am anymoreNot once in life have I been realBut I never felt this close beforeI’ve been looking in your windowI’ve been dressing inContinue reading “Dressing Up the Dead”

Protection

As I’m starting my four book, the theme of protection comes up several times. Any one who has experienced any type of trauma knows that protection is one of our first priorities. I believe it is something that survivors of sexual abuse rarely let loose. First of all, physical protection is crucial in how aContinue reading “Protection”

Maintaining Connections

Recently, I’ve re-connected with some friends from high school and college. It’s been invigorating for me because I’m very much an introvert. Especially since I’ve been teaching from home, I’ve become deeply involved in my introverted activities. I confessed to one of my friends that I need to reach out to others more because, ifContinue reading “Maintaining Connections”

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