I’ve just finished my 30th year of teaching. The end of the school year always gives me a time to reflect on the progress, or sometimes the lack of progress, I have made. Overall, I feel that I’m in a good place, but I recognize that there are still areas where I need to improve.
I’ve been off antidepressants for a year and a half, and my body is still making some adjustments. However, I feel happier than I have in a long while. I’ve been able to manage some of the depressive feelings using the tools that I have learned in therapy. And speaking of therapy, I have been doing life without a coach for six months now. I feel like I’ve been able to communicate better about what is going on with my wife and with others around me. These are things I haven’t been able to do in my life at all.
Yet, I still need to be better at communicating my needs to others. I still assume that I’m being too needy or too dependent on others if I feel like I need to talk to someone or just want to spend time with someone else. One of my strongest “love languages” is quality time. I love it when I get to do something with someone else, even if it’s not something I would prefer to do. It’s the other person I enjoy being with, and that is what is important to me.
Also, I’m not very good at establishing and maintaining boundaries within friendships. I don’t want to tell someone no, so I’ll be a little passive about the situation and just go along with what that other person wants. I never stop to consider that it might be just as harmful to them. How would I feel if someone felt compelled to do or agree to something for me, and just remained silent about it? I have to be better in this area.
I believe it’s really important for all of us to take time to reflect on our current situation. It can be every few months, but sometimes it’s a good thing to look back at the week or even the day to see how you have progressed. It can be very motivating as you move forward in your journey!
Harry L. Estes 