Journaling

Obviously, if you’ve been on this site, you know that I am a self-published author. I’ve also posted about writing out our survivor stories before, and I want to emphasize this as a process for you as a survivor again. It truly is a valuable way to express your trauma.

In addition to therapy, writing out my survivor story was the most healing exercise that I have done. Whether you write your story as a fictional narrative, like I was able to do, or whether you journal your memories as best as you can, I encourage you to put your thoughts, feelings, and ideas on paper or electronically. The physical process of writing your memories and experiences slows down the thoughts in your brain, which for me allowed me to sit with the emotions and to process the memories much better than anything else. I was then able to talk with my therapist and my wife about what was going on through my writing. It allowed me to make connections between what happened to me and the perceptions I had maintained about my abuse for years. Additionally, I could insert some logical, rational thoughts and understanding into how I viewed myself. Therapy became easier and more productive, which lead to a healthier outlook on my life.

Now, some of you may be thinking that you’re not a good writer and it’s always been difficult for you to journal your thoughts and feelings. I would politely suggest that you put aside your hang-ups. This is for you and only you to help with your healing process. No one has to read it, so it doesn’t matter if you don’t win a Nobel prize for literature. No one is going to check your spelling, your grammar, or your punctuation with a red pen, either. So, allow yourself the freedom to write or type away. Just write and don’t go back to correct any mistakes you make. It takes a while to do that, but soon you’ll find you are getting lost in your story.

Lastly, I know that I just mentioned that no one has to read it, but I think you would find it valuable to share your story with someone else. For another survivor, it can help them not feel so alone and isolated. For someone who has not been sexually abuse, your story can go a long way in helping them understand you and others who have had this trauma happen to them. I would love it if all survivors would write their story and publish it for others to read. I believe this is one step in helping solve the problem of childhood sexual abuse. Regardless of what you decide to do with your story, I hope that you find value in the narrative that makes up your life.